Security Refresher

In the aftermath of the recent incident, we would like to take a moment to reacquaint all fart dot horse employees, contractors, and inmate laborers with a few basic security policies:

  • Unauthorized disclosures of company information can threaten our business. Never discuss proprietary information with competitors, members of the public, or war crimes tribunals.
     
  • Always honor the blood oath.
     
  • Subversive materials found on the premises should be brought to the security office for incineration.
     
  • Urine and saliva samples may be required for drug testing following workplace accidents or credible indications of disloyalty. You are responsible for maintaining adequate levels of moisture at all times.
     
  • Suspicious behavior must be reported to the security office at once. Unexplained affluence, a change in work habits, or questioning of the blood oath are common signs of a subversive person.
     
  • Only members of the Morale Squad may possess edged weapons in company facilities.
     
  • Subversive persons found on the premises should be brought to the security office for questioning and incineration.
     
  • Always honor the blood oath.

The text of the blood oath is available for review in the security office.

-CHAD