In the aftermath of the recent incident, we would like to take a moment to reacquaint all fart dot horse employees, contractors, and inmate laborers with a few basic security policies:
- Unauthorized disclosures of company information can threaten our business. Never discuss proprietary information with competitors, members of the public, or war crimes tribunals.
- Always honor the blood oath.
- Subversive materials found on the premises should be brought to the security office for incineration.
- Urine and saliva samples may be required for drug testing following workplace accidents or credible indications of disloyalty. You are responsible for maintaining adequate levels of moisture at all times.
- Suspicious behavior must be reported to the security office at once. Unexplained affluence, a change in work habits, or questioning of the blood oath are common signs of a subversive person.
- Only members of the Morale Squad may possess edged weapons in company facilities.
- Subversive persons found on the premises should be brought to the security office for questioning and incineration.
- Always honor the blood oath.
The text of the blood oath is available for review in the security office.
-CHAD